Adolescence

A Human being has two phases in life: The phase of Childhood and that of Adulthood. The transitional period during which a person transforms from childhood to adulthood is referred to as Adolescence.

The phase of Childhood is that of dependency on the Adults as a person undergoes both mental and physical growth. This growth has to continue on both the spheres until a person has reached such a stage that he can live an independent life.

Adulthood is that phase of human life during which a person takes charge of his affairs as he has developed all the necessary abilities, most importantly mental ability, to live an independent and responsible life. An adult is held accountable for all his activities.

At Adolescence, the neural integrations have reached such a critical stage that a person, for the first time in life, is able to watch himself as he engages in conscious activities. A child, though conscious, is not capable of watching and assessing his activities.

It is this new ability of an Adolescent to watch the ‘self’ that creates the quest to know the self.

An Adolescent, instead of just trying to cope with life, as it had been in childhood, wants to have a say in his living. He wants to know why he does what he does and wants to know the purpose of his living. Indeed, it is a period of revolution or rebirth.

While the majority simply regress into Childhood, the brave and wise ones cease the bull by the horn; avail themselves of the holy opportunity; and open the door into the world of reality.

The prophets were sent to discourage laziness and to encourage the cultivation of the Mind.

The inability of a person during the phase of childhood to stand against his desire makes it difficult for him to see the two sides of life. We say that there is simplicity of mind. Because of this simplicity, beliefs are formed hastily and are therefore not free from errors.

When at Adolescence a person begins to see himself and becomes curious about his world, he is caught in confusion because of the multitude of questions that confront him. He was not bordered by the questions while he was a child. The once seemingly simple life has become challenging.

This is what Jones wrote about an Adolescent lady in his book - Every Woman:
With the hormonal tides which ebb and flow before and after the menarche, with increasing knowledge and with increasing information (and misinformation) from her peer group, the adolescent has to adjust to a new identity - that of a young woman.

She has to emerge from the family oriented dependent tranquillity of childhood and enter the frustrations, competitiveness and trauma of adult life.

…she begins to become much closer to the teenagers than to her family. From them she learns of different attitudes to morality and to sexuality.

She now has to resolve a conflict. She has to decide which set of values she should adopt, or more accurately, how many of her parents’ values she will reject.

And at this time she begins to feel the force of new, ill-understood heterosexual attractions. These are outward expression of inward conflicts, of frustrations, of doubts, even of despair.

…The adolescent resents adults’ criticism, particularly when she is told to behave one way by parents who are quite clearly behaving in an entirely different way.

Adults complain about the irresponsibility of teenagers, about their lack of respect, about their morals and about their promiscuity. Yet it is difficult to ask teenagers to develop responsibility when adults seem to be rejecting it, and when society seems to be fragmenting. It is particularly difficult to ask young people to maintain sexual responsibility, when the mass media constantly emphasise that all wants can be instantly gratified.

The adolescent needs understanding and love. And she needs to be able to talk to someone close to her, not to have to talk to her parents as strangers.

If parents are unable to answer her questions regarding social, moral and sexual attitudes, they have failed as parents, and should not blame their child if she appears to have failed them.

In adolescence, the need for privacy, for intimacy and for erotic expression should be recognised by the child’s parents; and parents should try to stress that there are satisfying, non-exploiting ways of meeting their needs. They should accept that much information (and misinformation) comes from other children in the child’s group.” Every woman pp49-50.

Given that majority of us do not think, most of us never found satisfactory way to resolve this conflict. We remain the Ignorant Masses with our Simple minds. To feel up the vacuum, we take to superstitions or we continue to live our Traditional life. Meanwhile, the mind remains worried.

It is in view of this situation that Prophets (God’s blessings be with them) were sent to come and take us from this Darkness into the Reality of Life.

EXTERNAL EXAM SUPERVISORS AND FEMALE STUDENTS

My experience writing exams has made me to write about this issue of external exam supervisors and female students. I am not saying am the first to experience this sort of thing and am also not seeing this happen for the first time.

It is a known thing in Universities now, even in Secondary schools that teachers make advances to their female students regardless of their class or age. It gets to a stage that when the student refuses to accept them, they threaten the student of failure and this is when the girl is forced to give them a positive answer.

For instance, I was approached by two men that came to supervise my exams, though one didn’t make matters tough for me, the second however threatened to make sure I fail three subjects in my exams and these are subjects I wasn’t ready to compromise so I said to the second man that those three subjects he’s threatening to make sure I fail, I had passed them in the first set of exam I wrote last year.

However, when I asked him why he said he will make sure I fail three subjects at a go, he said he doesn’t like me, I asked why a second time and he said he doesn’t like my face, so I decided to let him be, all of a sudden he called me back and said he likes me and would like it if I date him. So I laughed and told him he can do what he likes, I also told him not to worry that I will make my papers with or without him.

I sincerely think people need to reason more with their brains, imagine a married man with children wanting an 18yr old. Anyway, I guess it’s not a new thing but I think actions need to be taken on these men that don’t know how to respect themselves.

Enough said already, am extremely cold here.