Expensive Cell Phones

The subject of this post might seem inappropriate but I didnt want to make the topic longer than the post.

Anyway, I had to make an emergency trip to the market at about 6:30pm yesterday and getting to the market I noticed a physically disabled man who is sitting by the roadside begging for money from people. He was chatting happily with his fellow mate.
I was going to look away but something caught my eyes - The cute cell phone in his hands.

If a beggar is carrying that kinda phone then he needs no assistance whatsoever. He could simply sell that phone and then try to come up with a little lucrative business idea.

I wonder why am making this my business.

A Pair Of Jeans, 3 Packets of Chocolate and a Greeting Card

Hmmmm, how do I begin?

Ok.

The day began with me making some phone calls at about 7am (I detest midnight calls). So I called up a few friends and asked how the day was gonna be like, all of them kept telling me they have to be at work.

After an hour of consoling myself that I’ll be all alone on Valentine with no one to share the love cos HE is not around.

Got up at about 8am and made myself a nice, yummy breakfast of fried potatoes and egg with a glass of cold tea. Mummy dearest was in her room getting ready to go to work while I was busy enjoying my meal with some cool vibes in the living room.

THEN the phone call came!

One of my close friends called and asked me to get my arse to her house before she kicks it. lol. I no waste time at all, by 10:30am, I was in her crib, and I was feeling the music outside before I even went it, then almighty PHCN began to mess up. Sharp sharp we put on the generator. Nothing go spoil this fun at all.

And then friends began to troop in. Gosh that bash was FUN-TAS-TIC. I had so much fun I cant even begin to narrate. Y’all will get bored with me talking.

Then I got another phone call. This guy that has been having a crush on me called and said he was at my gate. I would have naturally said I wasnt home, but because na Val’s day, I didnt want to hurt anyone’s feelings o. So I left the party, came home and oh yeah, a valentine present o.

Wrapped so tight I couldnt even guess.(hmm, boys sha, when dem want wrap gift. Chei!). He even said “Dont open till you get inside your bedroom” hehehe

As soon as he left, I went inside, my nosy neighbor didnt even allow me to open the thing sef. She grapped the bag and ripped it open to reveal a blue jean, 3 packets of chocolate and a cute greeting card. The only present I got.(At least e better pass my birthday were I no get even chewing gum from anybody)

Came back home at 8pm, mummy dearest was already home, with a guest.

All in all, it was a great day for me. I had loads and loads of FUN.

But my waist is killing me. That dance no be small thing. From morning till evening, na dance.

It’s Valentine!

Yes, It’s Valentine. Another February 14th. A day for lovers. A day boys spend money on girls. A day where girls sit in front of their doorsteps waiting to receive all the Valentine specials. Abi I lie? lol

Ok. Enough of the jokes abeg.

Honestly I think Valentine is often overrated by so many people. Why do we all have to wait till February 14th of every year before we can do a little special something something for our partner?

I believe everyday is Valentines day for true lovers. They really dont have to wait till a certain day before they can prove to their loved ones in a certain way that they do love them.

And yes oo, lest I forget, its a day where some boys/guys (of course the useless ones) request for that thing, of course we all know what am talking about. Want me to spill it in black and white? Ok. Its a day where some boys request for sex in return for the presents and all the chocolates (even if dem no talk am, the fact that he wants to touch you after giving you those expensive things should ring a bell in your *****)

Abi na lie?

Its on that day you’ll see all sorts of things.

Like I always say, if you cant stay away from having a little fun with your partner (you know some people call it the thank you present and its often tagged as SPECIAL), please use that little thing the whole world knows as CONDOM.

HIV/AIDS and STD’s are real. And we all know there is no cure to most of these things.

So, PLAY SAFE

           HAPPY VALENTINE EVERYONE.

The Love Bug - The Basketball Coach

I arrived the basketball court at about 9am one Saturday morning, putting on my favorite pink and black colored track suit which had a real cool design on the ass of the trouser that said “GANGSHIDI” which I always love to show off.

I arrived the court panting because I jogged all the way from my house to the court. Of course I was late as usual!

There I was coming from afar and looking ahead, I saw him with a big smile plastered on his face. He is my basketball coach!

Getting to the court to begin the game, he draws closer to me and whispers in my ears “I miss you”. I stood there, in the middle of the court, completely dumb founded. Not because he said he misses me but because this man is married with 4 kids and his first daughter is probably in ss1 or ss2 right now!

Another Saturday morning, I was at the court again, this time fully dressed in my balling shorts and sleeveless t-shirt. I arrived the court earlier than he did so I began to practice my jump shots and then he came, we were playing a little one on one before other members of the team arrive and he was looking distant, I was kinda concerned so I took a time out and asked what the problem was, he then told me “I’m trying so hard not to fall in love with you”.

Shuo, see me see wahala oo. At this point am thinking “Is he sane”.

Then last week Saturday before I got pissed of and left the court, he looked at me in a strange kind of way and I asked,

Me : Coach, wettin happen?

Him : Nothing I just de look your lips.

Me : (Surprised) whats wrong with my lips? Is something on it?

Him : No. Wetin you de use for your lips?

Me : Nothing. You don ever see me with make up? Why you de ask?

Him : They look succulent.

Chei, I wan explode.

That afternoon after the game, we all went out to have a few drinks (Including some basketballers), we got to our destination and we ordered. Everything went cool until when we left to go back to our various homes, he was driving so he had to drop us all before he could go. While we were on the road he said “Queen, everyone at the court says I am tripping for you” though I simply laughed at the statement, I was kinda shocked to know other player had noticed all that has been going on.

All of a sudden he screams, “Now I’m saying it loud and clear so this players here can hear me : I am in Love with you!. I love you!”

At that moment, I was SPEECHLESS. But at the same time, at the back of my mind I was saying “e be like say you don de kolo, you de craze”

Then he turns to look at me, and guess what, he brought out his tongue to do a kind of licking motion. Damn! it was gross.

I knew everyone will drop before me so I made up a flimsy excuse that I needed to check up on someone close to the court before I can go home. Yeah, he fell for it.

He did drop all of us in the same location but still managed to ask me how we were going to hang out.

That man no get shame at all o

I said, “Sir, I dont know, I’m kinda busy this days at home and I barely have the time for myself”

He says, dont worry, I will work something out.

Looking at the time on my phone I pretend to be late and told him I had to go. He looks at me again and says “I am missing you”

I guess its high time I find myself a female team to play with and a female basketball coach!

This is one horror I wont love to see repeat itself!

UnderEstimated Part 1

There is nothing that hurts me more than being underestimated.

Though it makes me to strive harder to prove alot of people wrong, it also makes me curse and swear alot. I do face this challenge mostly at the basketball court where I train every saturday for 3 hours.

As usual I was at the court for my daily training, and the game was on, and as usual I was the only girl among maybe 10 male basketballers.

Sometimes guys just dont know when not to talk. I mean whats the big deal in loosing the ball to my opponents? And then the guy goes haywire at one of our parners

Him : Why you give the girl ball

Our Partner : Why I no go give am ball?

Him : You give am ball now she don loose the ball, why you give am?

Our Partner : Whats wrong with me passing the ball to her?

At this point I couldnt take the argument so I joined in.

This is the conversation that ensued

Me : Tell me exactly why you think I cant make that basket?

Him : You are a girl and I dont think you can

Me : What the F**K has that got to do with the game?

Him : You cant play so go play for the other team, not mine

Me : F**K you psycho, who do you think you are. Do you think you are a better baller than every other person here? Matter of fact I bet I can beat you in a one on one game right now and I know whats killing you is the fact that I made the first freaking basket stupid.

Taurus Woman Personality Traits

I was checking out my daily Horoscopes today and I found this interesting write up about Taureans. You know whats funny is, about 95% of what was written there is true.

Read this…

When you come across a Taurus female, the first thing you will notice about her is her undefeatable emotional strength. She is capable of handling the severest of problems, without shedding even a single tear. She has the infamous Taurus temper, but it is seldom displayed. At least not until the provocation is too much to digest. She is as feminine as any other female, without the unnecessary tantrums. A Taurus woman has no desire of dominating her husband.

Hilarious!

I was snooping around CALABAR GAL’S BLOG when I came across the post she made with this YouTube Video, I actually fell of my chair laughing like mad and I couldn’t resist sharing this with you all

A new form of exercise she calls it. lol

Comment y’all